What Your Bedroom Says About Your Relationship
A chaotic, cluttered bedroom is hard to miss. There can be clothing all over the floor, dressers piled high with folded washing, and bedside cabinets sporting a dozen or so cups and mugs.
To some, this can just be a messy bedroom, but it can also signal much more than that.
A cluttered and messy space can actually be avoidance – not only avoidance of cleaning it, but avoidance of other things in your life, as well.
As you may already know, clutter can be pretty distracting. When there are relationship problems and other issues you want to avoid, a cluttered space can be the very distraction you need.
Here’s a challenge for you.
A Neat and Tidy Bedroom
If you don’t see much difference between your bedroom and one from a house and garden magazine, then it’s clear to see it fits into the ‘neat and tidy bedroom’ category.
Be proud because this is an impressive feat. In saying that, a perfect bedroom doesn’t just mean you’re really good at putting away items when you’re finished with them.
It can also mean that you like to have control in your life and, maybe, your relationship. For the most part, this isn’t an issue.
Having control in your own home can make you feel safe. However, consider whether this control translates to other aspects of your life. Do you like to be in charge of everything? Do you struggle when things don’t go your way?
Surprisingly, a neat and tidy bedroom may even indicate problems with control, or a lack of it, in your life.
Put a few things out of place, and see how they make you feel.
We’re about to describe the average bedroom, and when we do, you’ll probably think, Hey! That sounds like my bedroom!
If it doesn’t sound like your bedroom, then yours may be one of imbalance.
There’s a bed against the wall at one end, with a bedside table on each side. The gap between the edge of the bed on the left and the right is the same.
There may also be two dressers at the other end or a wardrobe split in half for each partner in the relationship.
A bedroom of imbalance doesn’t look like this. Instead, one side of the bed might have a large gap so one person can get out of bed quickly, while the other might have a small walkway.
One person might have a side table, and the other doesn’t. There might even be an imbalance in clothing storage, with one person having a dresser, while the other has to store their clothing on shelving in the wardrobe.
This imbalance can be completely innocent, but it may also signal an imbalance of power in the relationship.
You’ll know which category you fit into when you attempt to shift that balance. Claim the bedside table, and see what comes next.
The Not-So Restful Place Of Rest
A bedroom is a place of rest. It’s where you go after a long day of work to catch some Zs before a new day begins.
It’s also a place for intimacy, where couples reignite their love for one another.
But not every bedroom is this straightforward and simple. Is your bedroom a multi-functional space? You will know just by looking around and seeing what’s present in the space.
You might have gym equipment crowding the corner, maybe a desk with a computer, or even a TV with a gaming console.
While having all of these things in one place can seem convenient, they may also point to some truths about your relationship.
You may be uncomfortable about intimacy, and having distractions make it easier to manage your discomfort.
Any clutter may also point back towards having an avoidant personality.
Unfinished, Undecided Bedroom
Do you have a fear of commitment? Do you worry about making big mistakes – in your life and relationship?
What about a fear of making life-changing decisions? You may not think so, but your bedroom can tell another story.
An unfinished bedroom that almost looks like you’re undecided can be quite telling.
Such a bedroom doesn’t have a clear theme and may have plenty of half-finished projects waiting for you to get around to doing them. For example, you might have started a photo wall that you never quite finished or a piece of artwork leaning against the wall that never made it onto the wall.
You might even still have flatpack furniture in boxes, waiting for you to put them together. Fear of it not being what you wanted, or making big mistakes, can be what leads you to not wanting to finish everything you’ve started.
What Does Your Bedroom Say About You?
If you’ve identified your bedroom in one of the descriptions above, you may find that we’ve hit the nail on the head with the type of person you are.
Or, we may have it completely wrong! There’s only one way to find out. Change the style of bedroom you have, and see if your moods, emotions, and relationships change as a result.